Movie night is finished, pizza and pretzels consumed. Baby is in bed and so is hubby and here I sit. Mind is swirling and a bit out of control.
A friend said the green eyed monster moved into her house today and I realized I've been carrying him around for a very long time. We lost our home last year, one of our cars had to be sold, I lost my job and my Mom was diagnosed with Cancer. My Nana tried to die of pneumonia, we won't be having any more babies, my best friend is far away, I have had no new clothes in over two years and I am again living in an apartment. My baby girl was born one month early under stressful circumstances and I grieve over all of these things. I fret and worry about what others have instead of seeing this...
I have a husband who loves me.
A healthy baby girl who is smart, pretty and truly amazing.
I have a roof over my head in a town I really love.
We live close enough to my husbands work to allow us to have just one car and a bicycle that he rides daily rain or shine...and doesn't complain.
We have food in the fridge and I am a good cook...better each day surprisingly.
The clothes I do have are not so worn out that I can't wear them...also surprisingly.
God has provided each and every time I think there is no way we will make it.
I know it is human nature to want, to be jealous, to try to keep up with the Jones'. But what if each of us didn't...what if we were happy with what we have and who we are and where we are at right now? How much better would our lives be?
More importantly, how much better would my life be?
I can't say that tomorrow morning I'm going to wake up and be happy putting on my worn out target shoes and my almost holy jeans but what if I did?
Trying to keep on keeping on without loosing my mind to the green eyed monster just one day at a time. Just one moment at a time. Just one second...Isn't that what we are all trying to do?
A friend said the green eyed monster moved into her house today and I realized I've been carrying him around for a very long time. We lost our home last year, one of our cars had to be sold, I lost my job and my Mom was diagnosed with Cancer. My Nana tried to die of pneumonia, we won't be having any more babies, my best friend is far away, I have had no new clothes in over two years and I am again living in an apartment. My baby girl was born one month early under stressful circumstances and I grieve over all of these things. I fret and worry about what others have instead of seeing this...
I have a husband who loves me.
A healthy baby girl who is smart, pretty and truly amazing.
I have a roof over my head in a town I really love.
We live close enough to my husbands work to allow us to have just one car and a bicycle that he rides daily rain or shine...and doesn't complain.
We have food in the fridge and I am a good cook...better each day surprisingly.
The clothes I do have are not so worn out that I can't wear them...also surprisingly.
God has provided each and every time I think there is no way we will make it.
I know it is human nature to want, to be jealous, to try to keep up with the Jones'. But what if each of us didn't...what if we were happy with what we have and who we are and where we are at right now? How much better would our lives be?
More importantly, how much better would my life be?
I can't say that tomorrow morning I'm going to wake up and be happy putting on my worn out target shoes and my almost holy jeans but what if I did?
Trying to keep on keeping on without loosing my mind to the green eyed monster just one day at a time. Just one moment at a time. Just one second...Isn't that what we are all trying to do?
No comments:
Post a Comment